Wow.  I just finished the most amazing book.  I’m eager to share it with Liliana when she’s old enough.  I think this would become one of those books that acts as Are You There, God?  It’s Me, Margaret did for teenaged girls way back when.  What a relief, what a revelation–when you realize that someone besides you feels this way…and that it’s okay.

Harrison pours her heart out onto the page.  It’s her personal journal–mostly collages–kept in the year between her 21st and 22nd year.  Her doubts, her sorrows, her angst…everything’s there…in full color–said beautifully, plainly, truthfully.

And then I go online and find that she has a whole array of other books, other artwork, and I take some time to revel in them.  Thing is: she’s messy where I’m not, she’s forthright where I’m not, she’s risky where I’m not…and I so admire that.

Now I’m contemplating starting one of these doohickeys for myself (and I say that in the nicest way possible, because I’m not sure how mine would turn out).

May I show you a couple of pages?  I’ll translate them for you, if you can’t read them.

“I thought a lot today about Limitless Love.
Most of the time I spend worrying
About the people in my life WHO
love me conditionally–WITH LIMITS
deciding WHEN and HOW
they will love me and
HOW they will Edit the
love they will
show me.
The Problem lies in how I then
Edit and Limit the Love
I am showing and giving
(for fear of not being loved in return)
And thats [sic] not how I want
to live in Love.”

“I want to touch on all the sides
of Love–the Hope + Gladness
as well as the Anxiety + Ache.
The Biggest thing about Love that
I have discovered is that Love isn’t
just ONE WAY–there isn’t just
a point of perfection that makes
it ‘All okay + great from NOW ON.’

I am discovering that what I
am needing to learn in love is gonna
KEEP coming up.  Oh yes!
This morning I woke up from a very restless
sleep with Anxiety about replacement
And I just exclaimed to myself
HAVEN’T I LEARNED this yet?!
haven’t I learned HOW to handle these
feelings yet?  the answer: NOPE.”

And I have to include this one.  This is the quote from Rainer Maria Rilke on my blog’s home page.

“You are so young
you stand before beginnings.
I would like to beg of you
dear friend, as well as I can
TO HAVE PATIENCE
with everything that
remains unsolved
in your HEART.
Try to LOVE the QUESTIONS
themselves like Locked ROOMS + BOOKS WRITTEN in
a FOREIGN LANGUAGE.
Do not now look for
the Answers.  They
cannot be given to you
Because you could not LIVE them.
It is A Question of
experiencing
EVERYTHING…
You need to Live the Questions
Perhaps you will gradually without
even noticing it, FIND YOUSELF [sic]
experiencing the Answer,
some distant Day.”

The whole reading experience was like having a great cup of tea with a dear friend.  Read it.  You’ll see.

Tomorrow, I’m “outing” myself.  Yep, coming out of the closet, so to speak.  And discussing my feelings about McLaren’s latest book A New Kind of Christianity.  Heck, we need something new.  The old ain’t working.  At least for me.

Then, on Monday, I’ll have my thoughts on another controversial topic–why we eat compulsively.  I’ll be referring to this book I picked up–oh, let’s see, what was it again?–oh yeah, Women Food and God.

May your weekend be full of unconditional love–for you and for others!

[Post image: Partial of Spilling Open by Sabrina Ward Harrison cover]